Yesterday, because of our sweet little blessing, I was able to celebrate mother's day for the first time.
Though it was a precious, wonderful day, I could not help but recall Mother's days of the past.
Two years ago I was so distraught and saddened by our infertility issues I could not make myself attend church on mother's day. Though meant to be a day of celebrating, it was a painful reminder of my loss. While others were in church, I took our dog for a walk and returned home to a beautiful bouquet of flowers in a straw tied mason jar. Attached was the sweetest note from a friend...a friend who had a beautiful two year old, but who had previously walked the long journey of infertility. I still have her card on my bedside table. Although I was not yet a mother, it was such a blessing to have my longing of motherhood recognized and to be encouraged that my time of celebration would too come.
Last year on mother's day we knew about Baker...but, sat in a precarious situation. With two failed adoptions already under our belt, we realistically knew that our prospective adoption would not be "official" until late June. While in my heart Baker was already ours, I couldn't really allow myself the freedom to celebrate. However, I did muster up the courage to attend church that morning, and I'm thankful I did. After the mother's stood to be recognized that morning (which, of note, I believe makes it extremely awkward for people "of age" who do not yet have children, have had miscarriages, or have lost children...but that is a soap box I won't get into right now) two of my sweet friends (a mother and daughter) turned around and said to me, "That will be you next year." Tears started forming then as another dear friend came and sat beside me and had me read one of the most encouraging and prayerful cards about my future of motherhood--after which I began the "ugly" cry (you know what I'm talking about).
What a joy it was this mother's day to be woken up by a crying baby. Though not always a welcomed sound, yesterday it was...especially after recalling the past two mother's days. On top of being able to celebrate with my wonderful husband (who gave me the most creative and thoughtful gift--I will post a pic later) and adorable son, we were with my mother...my biggest cheerleader in life. She is such a role model of love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. I am blessed to be her daughter.
Baker's birth mother also had a reason to be honored yesterday. She will always and forever have a place in our hearts on mother's day. Her selfless decision to give him life provided us a family. Earlier last week we sent her a package with several recent pictures and a craft Baker helped make (thank you pinterest). The day after we sent her package, I received a gift from her family. The sweetest part about it? The envelope was addressed to "Baker's mom." Love them! We are so blessed to be in an open adoption with such an amazing family. She and I exchanged several texts yesterday...sweet moments I will cherish of my first mother's day celebration.