Joyful celebration...

Yesterday, because of our sweet little blessing, I was able to celebrate mother's day for the first time.

Though it was a precious, wonderful day, I could not help but recall Mother's days of the past.

Two years ago I was so distraught and saddened by our infertility issues I could not make myself attend church on mother's day. Though meant to be a day of celebrating, it was a painful reminder of my loss. While others were in church, I took our dog for a walk and returned home to a beautiful bouquet of flowers in a straw tied mason jar. Attached was the sweetest note from a friend...a friend who had a beautiful two year old, but who had previously walked the long journey of infertility. I still have her card on my bedside table. Although I was not yet a mother, it was such a blessing to have my longing of motherhood recognized and to be encouraged that my time of celebration would too come.

Last year on mother's day we knew about Baker...but, sat in a precarious situation. With two failed adoptions already under our belt, we realistically knew that our prospective adoption would not be "official" until late June. While in my heart Baker was already ours, I couldn't really allow myself the freedom to celebrate. However, I did muster up the courage to attend church that morning, and I'm thankful I did. After the mother's stood to be recognized that morning (which, of note, I believe makes it extremely awkward for people "of age" who do not yet have children, have had miscarriages, or have lost children...but that is a soap box I won't get into right now) two of my sweet friends (a mother and daughter) turned around and said to me, "That will be you next year." Tears started forming then as another dear friend came and sat beside me and had me read one of the most encouraging and prayerful cards about my future of motherhood--after which I began the "ugly" cry (you know what I'm talking about).

What a joy it was this mother's day to be woken up by a crying baby. Though not always a welcomed sound, yesterday it was...especially after recalling the past two mother's days. On top of being able to celebrate with my wonderful husband (who gave me the most creative and thoughtful gift--I will post a pic later) and adorable son, we were with my mother...my biggest cheerleader in life. She is such a role model of love, grace, mercy, and forgiveness. I am blessed to be her daughter.

Baker's birth mother also had a reason to be honored yesterday. She will always and forever have a place in our hearts on mother's day. Her selfless decision to give him life provided us a family. Earlier last week we sent her a package with several recent pictures and a craft Baker helped make (thank you pinterest). The day after we sent her package, I received a gift from her family. The sweetest part about it? The envelope was addressed to "Baker's mom." Love them! We are so blessed to be in an open adoption with such an amazing family. She and I exchanged several texts yesterday...sweet moments I will cherish of my first mother's day celebration.

Beautiful...

It is a goal of mine to catch up with posts on our adorable little ELEVEN month old (where has the time gone?!)...but today is not the day for that to take place. I did, however, want to post an incredibly beautiful and challenging video. If you have the time, please watch...

Congratulations...

...Lauren and Rhett for winning the familetime giveaway!!! 

Please email me (warrenandjill@gmail.com) and I will explain how you can redeem your win. I hope familetime becomes a wonderful way to share the milestones of your new baby!

Giveaway!!!

I am so excited to be able to host a giveaway for familetime...


familetime is designed to enable families to privately and securely share information today, while creating a web-based family scrapbook for years to come. Since we live hours away from both of our parents, Warren and I rely heavily on the internet to share pictures and  updates on our little blessing. With familetime we are able to do that in a secure format that enables us to share more than pictures...it enables us to blog, send announcements, have a message board, post our calendar, etc. On top of that, it is private and secure--only family members and friends you add will have access to this information. 


I'm thankful our family can stay updated with us on our blog....but, lets just be honest...as an adoptive mother, and because the "blog world" is so very public, there are only so many things I can post and talk about. To me, familetime is the perfect avenue to share important moments, pictures, and events that I don't feel free to upload on my blog. 


Their tagline is "Connecting Families, Collecting Memories" ...and they are willing to give away an annual premium subscription to familetime. All you need to do is reply to this post and share how you think you might use familetime to connect your family and collect your memories. I will draw for the winner Sunday night and then will reveal on Monday. 


Good luck!

Joy...

...joy...sums up these last seven days. Even in the midst of our move, readjustment, the challenging transition of moving from two incomes to one...there has been joy. God has been so good to us. He provided a buyer for our home in Georgia--and led us to put a contract on a great house in Arkansas. Our sweet baby boy is NINE months old today...

...joy! I am still in awe of the grace of God that allowed us the opportunity to be Baker's parents. Almost one year ago we received a call that Baker's birthmother wanted to meet us. How our lives have changed since that moment! It is pure joy hearing his laugh and listening to him babble (though he spends time all day with "ma ma" all he wants to say over and over again is "da da da da da"). I find joy in watching him grow and develop. Having the opportunity to wipe tears from his eyes, though it hurts my heart, also brings me joy (he has learned the art of pulling up and has recently become brave enough to attempt moving from one piece of furniture to the next...often ending with a thud on the floor). It brings me joy to budget and pinch pennies..all which enable me the opportunity to stay home with him. The love Baker's birthmother and birthfather have for him is a beautiful/joyful thing...they still call, text, and send him cards and gifts. We have a unique and special bond with his birthmother...likely because we have an open adoption...I am his mother, but he also has a birthmother that carried him for nine months and loved him so much that she took care of herself (and him) during that time--eventually making an incredibly selfless decision--sacrificing her own desires for his well being. Some may find it odd we are so close and open with her...but, it is our "normal"...and in that we find joy.

Praying God continues to allow me to find joy in my circumstances...to be aware of the silver lining...and to continue trusting He works everything for HIS good.

p.s. I will be hosting a wonderful giveaway tomorrow--so please stop by and enter!

Steadfast...

"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me." Psalm 51:10

A close friend of mine sent me a text with this scripture attached yesterday. She didn't know specifics, but knew I was in kind of a rough spot. Little did she know how much I needed to read these words. You see, I don't think I can describe my spirit as being firmly loyal, constant, unchanging, or steady this past month. Now, granted, there have been just a few changes in our life recently: saying goodbye to friends, leaving my job, moving with my family to a new state, and transitioning to being a stay-at-home mother (in a new place...where I know few people). These adjustments have been challenging, for sure! And, likely, I should cut myself a little slack...However, I unfortunately possess the personality traits of a perfectionist (you know... those people that want things to fall into place flawlessly--is there really such a thing?!--and immediately). So, instead of having a steadfast spirit, my emotions and thoughts have been up and down like the waves in the sea--solely based upon my circumstances. I realize I am human and am certainly not the first to base my happiness on the highs and lows of my journey. But, as a woman who is seeking to follow God, I realize that my life perspective needs to be a little different. I am not going to lie, though...it is not easy to have a steadfast spirit when God has called you to something new...to hold firm, to press forward, to keep trying when all you feel like doing is the opposite. However, the same friend that sent me the above verse, sent me another one today...

"...Since God assured us, 'I'll never let you down, never walk off and leave you.'" Hebrews 13:5 (The Message)

I don't have to be "steadfast" on my own power or resolve. Honestly, there is not even a small chance I can adjust to new circumstances without His power working in me and through me. So, my life application??--1) claim Psalm 51:10 and Hebrews 13:5, 2) stop relying on my own strength to make it through, and 3) begin to catch myself when I realize my contentment is being found in circumstances instead of in the only thing that is constant in my life (Jesus). 

Adjustments are hard...change is never easy. We all go through it...ours may be different from the couple down the street, but still--change is change. My selfish side screams..."God, haven't we had enough adjustments and challenges in our life over the past few years?"...but, then I'm reminded that He has used every trial we have encountered to strengthen our character and reveal His grace in ways we may have never known. 

One good thing about our move?! I have been able to reconnect with some old friends (from middle school--love it!!) and we were able to spend a day with our dear friends Ashley and Leo (they are stationed with the Marines in California, but were in Texas over the holidays)...

...another good thing about our move?? --I have LOVED spending lots of one on one time with this handsome little fella...

...It's hard to imagine that this time last year our homestudy was approved...and now here with are with the most amazing seven month old little blessing!

Seeing Baker's face reminds me that God answers prayer...AND that while we cannot see the end result in the midst of our most difficult moments, God works everything out for his good (He provides and never leaves us hanging)...but, we must remain steadfast.