A little bit of everything...

God has blessed us in so many ways in the past week! God laid it on the heart of some very precious friends of ours to donate to our adoption...we were very humbled and extremely grateful for their generosity. Through them, God reminded us again that He is faithful...and He WILL provide all we need!

It was also a wonderful blessing to get to spend a little bit of time with my sister, my brother-in-law, and my nieces last weekend. While here, my sister took pictures of us for our Christmas card AND pictures we will use in our adoption profile book. Here's a little look at some shots she captured...

I absolutely love my sister's camera...However, the amazingnessof her camera means she is able to capture some of the not so pretty moments...like me reenacting a noise that came out of Warren's esophagus while he gave the camera his most serious of looks...

AND, Warren showing me his "real" smile after I was continually encouraging him to "not smile fake"

But, I think this one below (or it's colored version) may be used in our Christmas Card. Doesn't Marley look so cute??

...Which brings me to another topic. Some of you probably know that Shutterfly is giving away fifty photo cards for blogging about their products. If you know me, you know I love a bargain (especially as we are pinching every penny possible to save for baby Gorman)...but it is definitely NOT hard to rave about Shutterfly's products. Warren and I have used Shutterfly for our Christmas cards the last three years. Since we live so far from our family and many of our friends, I feel like photo cards are most appropriate! What I love about Shutterfly is they have so many cute options for really great prices.

Every year for as long as I can remember, my mother has written her annual "Christmas letter" that updated all of our extended family and long distance friends of our years accomplishments...Well, I love this photo card from Shutterfly that connects the family pictures with a short/concise family letter...

...not as much details as my mother's letters in the past, but I think equally as cute and more time efficient!

I really love these photo cards as well...

(really love how unique this one is!!)

I can't quite tell if I love this design or if I really just love the picture of that little girl...I think it may be both...

She's so adorable!! :) And, lastly, though I do not consider myself much of a "glittery" type of person, I kind of like this card...

Some of these options are around .90...which I think that is a great price! Shutterfly's site is easy to use and they have tons of great options for cards, calendars, books, etc! I am considering making some of our adoption profile books (that we may pass out to law firms) through Shutterfly rather than making them all by hand "scrapbook style."


So, I hope you all enjoy this upcoming Thanksgiving week...I pray you will be aware of God's many blessings. Even in the midst of pain and heartache...even when we don't understand why things happen in our lives...He is good...and He works everything out for the good of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). He does not promise He will give us everything we think we need when we think we need it...He promises that His plan for us is a good one...even if we can't see it in the midst of our present troubles or pain.

The small things...

"We can all see God in the exceptional things, but it requires the culture of spiritual discipline to see God in every detail. Never allow that the haphazard is anything less than God's appointed order, and be ready to discover the Divine designs anywhere." Oswald Chambers (November 14)

I am choosing to see God in the small things. Sometimes we become so overwhelmed in life focusing on what's wrong...the "big problems"...or by simply focusing too much on ourselves that we miss out on what God is doing around us. Call me crazy, but I believe God wants to be involved in every little (and big) aspect of our lives...He is always present...but, sometimes we are just too busy or too consumed with ourselves to see Him.

Yesterday morning started out that way for me...I was completely frazzled...we had so much on our "to do" list...and God only knew that I needed a reminder, in the midst of my freaking out, that He was there.

We had physicals scheduled yesterday as part of our home study. I know this is probably "bad," but Warren and I do not have a family doctor...we really just never get sick...therefore, we decided to go to the corporate health center in town for our physicals instead of taking time to establish care with a family doctor. It's a rather large practice...and in it God reminded us once again of His heart for adoption. It all began when the first nurse (who was my age) took me back...in the process of checking my blood pressure, she told me SHE was adopted. This young woman was absolutely precious and shared her story about how thankful she was to be raised by her adoptive parents. We had such an encouraging conversation. During my physical, the doctor was asking questions about our adoption and then told me that HE was adopted as a baby!! At this point, the nurse in the room became teary-eyed and said, "I had hoped he was going to tell you that!" If those two stories were not enough, when Warren and I got in the car he told me that the physician that did his physical (different from mine) had adopted THEIR second child and shared with Warren some of their story...I had to go back later yesterday for my TB test and a nurse that I had not met earlier (who was probably in her late 40's) shared with me her story of infertility and of adopting HER child...My eyes began tearing up as she shared with me her journey and the joy it has been to raise her daughter. 

It was so encouraging to hear these stories and meet these four individuals yesterday...all of whose lives have been changed  for the better by adoption one way or the other. God showed up to me in the lives of these strangers...and reminded me, again, that adoption is exactly what He wants us to be doing! God has a way of getting a child into the right family. Ultimately, these children are His...and Warren and I will be blessed to have the opportunity...for just a few years...to invest in God's child...

Thank you, God, for allowing us to be encouraged by seeing you yesterday...in the small things...and in the midst of my frazzled mind!

Just a little update...we have finished our self-studies for the home study (whew!!) and we have completed and sent off the majority of our paperwork. Our physicals and drug screens our complete and our second set of fingerprints will be done next week! Now, we have to work on our adoption training classes and making our profile book... :) 

break my heart for what breaks yours...

God has been doing a great deal in our heats this week...It all began with a text I received from a dear friend, who is also adopting, wondering if we would be interested in a child of another race their lawyer had contacted them about. Honestly, though Warren and I had discussed different medical and prenatal issues, we had not fully discussed the issue of a child of a different ethnicity. I became uncomfortable...then equated my "uncomfortableness" with lies surrounding my not loving all of God's children equally. If you know me, you know that I am extremely hard on myself and am a very analytical person....so, my mind had a hay day with all of these lies that were swirling around. Thankfully, after coffee with a precious friend, meeting with my Tuesday morning Bible study group, and much prayer I finally had a peace. Precious Leanne (who lead our Tuesday morning Bible study retreat a few weekends ago and was able to attend our group this past Tuesday) reminded me that when a lie rears it's ugly head, a truth is always present...seeking the truth will set our hearts free! The truth is, my heart is for adoption. One year ago, I would have never been able to say this...but, God has filled mine and Warren's heart with a passion for the motherless and fatherless in this world. This is the truth! I was also reminded that Warren and I will be at peace when presented with the child he has for us. It will not be a struggle...When God calls us to something He gives us a joy and a passion about it!!

So, we learned to trust our hearts, we learned our hearts are for adoption, and we learned that whenever we are presented with the child God has for us (no matter the race, the possiblity of medical problems, the possibility of the mother's drug use), we WILL be at peace with it. We are willing and open to whatever race or medical problem...as long as it is the child God is preparing for us.

I have seen this video on a few adoption blogs...and wanted to post it here...Warren and I just watched it. I was reminded of the truths God has taught us over the past week. We desire for God to break our hearts for what breaks His...orphans break His heart...and we are willing to love the child He has for us...no matter how "difficult" the circumstance may seem from our human eyes.



Isaiah's Story from 31Films on Vimeo.

Big...

As I type this, I am sitting on a balcony, at the beach, staring at the ocean, and drinking hot chocolate…yes, you read me right. I am bundled in my favorite winter sweater listening to the sound of waves crash against the shore. We have been blessed to be given the opportunity enjoy the beach (one of my all-time favorite places) for free over the next couple of days…and this is day one. Unfortunately, the Internet is down (which is actually kind of freeing in a way). Therefore, this post will be published much later than it was written.

Like many others, when I stare at the ocean I am reminded of what a big and powerful God I serve. And, I am humbled that in his “bigness” (if you will), He chooses to have a close relationship with me…He cares about every little thing I am going through…He knows every minute detail of my life. This great big God wants to be involved with me and wants me to be involved in what He is doing. He knows how my heart has ached and longed for a child these past two years (and two months)…He has seen every tear I have shed…and He has given Warren and I the grace and peace to see that His plan was larger than anything we could have imagined.

I spent two years grieving the loss of the child we never had…Infertility can be an extremely lonely place. Especially at my age…when it seems everyone I know is getting pregnant by “accident.” You begin to feel like something is wrong…and, personally, I began to question my own identity. I began believing lies and I completely blamed myself for our lack of ability to call our parents with “exciting news.” My identity was wrapped up in my inability to conceive…and I began feeling like less of a woman.  It was a several month process before I saw how far down this road of false guilt I had fallen. While volunteering at the Passion Conference (with some precious friends from Texas) in January 2010, God brought me back to the all to simple truth that who I am cannot be found in my inability OR in my ability to have children…my worth and value are simply found in the great big God that wants an extremely intimate relationship with me. I am reminded daily that I am not alone…Though I serve a big God who created the world, the universe, the galaxy, and so on….I also serve a God that is very much near…that cares…and who delights in giving me the desires of my heart (though this may not come in the time or way I expect).